As humans, we have a strong need and impulse to find meaning in life
In depersonalization, derealization and dissociation, this obsessive search for meaning becomes the excuse for not feeling emotions, the intellectual entertainment as to why you should think instead of feeling 😌
So if you’ve been living with dpdr for any length of time, you can notice how you shift your focus from “feeling” to “understanding the meaning of the emotion, its causes, why it’s there, I don’t understand why it’s here, etc.”
If you were to zoom in in the depths of your mind, this is the underlying belief that drives these habits of thought: I CAN’T SURVIVE IF I DON’T KNOW WHAT AN EMOTION MEANS, I CAN’T SURVIVE IF I DON’T UNDERSTAND THE MEANING OF LIFE
Correct? This is what we all believe on some level
This belief drives you on so many levels to find meaning, to distract yourself from emotions, to shift focus from emotions to logic, to try to interpret your internal world as coherently as possible, etc.
BUT at the same time you lose joy in life, your mind becomes cluttered and scattered, you get lose in labyrinths of logic, your emotions now become an interesting idea/concept to analyze, and you can’t connect with people and motivate yourself
Paradoxically, in trying to find the meaning and the why of your emotions, you find more chaos and you feel more detached and numb 😅
And the reason is simple: It’s because as humans we deeply believe that having rational and coherent answers and knowing the meaning of emotions and life = surviving
This is exactly the belief you need to unlink to be free from dpdr!
In fact let me give you good news:
✅ You WILL survive even if you don’t know what an emotion means
✅ You WILL survive even if you don’t know where an emotion is coming from
✅ You WILL survive even if an emotion shatters your sense of identity because you’ve never felt this way
✅ You WILL survive even if you don’t know how to rationally explain an emotion in a way that “makes sense”
The real problem is not emotions, it’s what we do with them afterwards!
As a matter of fact living WITHOUT meaning and embracing the ‘meaninglessness’ of emotions not only will your survive — your life will become much simpler, your thinking clearer, your knowledge more refined, your emotions more real and you will feel grounded and present and alive and you will live more in “real-time”
So yes, you can survive and thrive in life EVEN without meaning. You don’t need meaning, an opinion and a description for everything that happens in life and for every emotion that you feel
From now on, give yourself the permisssion to feel without knowing why, the meaning and all that intellectual mess that you used to wrap around your emotions. Just FEEL. Period.
– Giuseppe, DPDR & Dissociation Specialist