This is the MOST important teaching i’ve learned both in achieving my personal goals and as a therapist: Real change happens when you push THROUGH pain and discomfort. 💪
No beating around the bush. There are no fancy techniques. No theories. No secrets.
You HAVE to stop your little excuses and your “I cant do it because [insert compelling explanation]” and you have to go THROUGH discomfort and facing it head-on is what is going to make you stronger as a person.
My grandma has just turned 87 and has survived world war 2, raised 8 kids pretty much on her own with no psychological or emotional support, married a man that was imposed upon her, survived starvation, worked in countryside while pregnant and while carrying her kids with her
She doesnt know anything about mindset or breathing techniques, doesnt know anything about “limiting beliefs and internal blockages”, didnt go to school, didnt watch motivational videos on Youtube, didnt join support groups on Facebook, grew up in countryside with no internet among cows and sheeps..
yet she is still alive, remembers every detail of her life as if it happened yesterday, and has still the strength to tell her story
To me this is what i call real STRENGTH and being STRONG as a person
But what i see nowadays is that we have the opposite problem: We have too MANY options
Too many books to choose from on Amazon
Too many videos to watch on Youtube and searching for “injections of inspirations” and “waiting to be motivated and inspired” before taking action
Too many support groups on Facebook where to post shit looking for social validation and “to feel less alone” and to share inspirational quotes and get some likes and validation
Too many options, choices, decisions, information, groups, articles, courses, posts, data, comforts, theories.. too much cuddling and laziness and comfort etc.
You have a problem? Dont worry there’s a theory that explains that
You have a symptom? Dont worry it belongs to dissociation disorders and there’s an explanation for that
Look, i love technology and the internet. And I love the subconscious and all this stuff about psychology and the mind and emotions.
And i consider myself pretty sensitive and i can pick up peoples emotions very quickly to a level that most cant (otherwise i wouldnt be a therapist)..
..but people today give themselves too many excuses and with all this cuddling are becoming psychologically and emotionally weak
So these options and theories we have nowadays is not necessarily the problem, thats good actually as its a sign of creative expression and progress..
it’s just that people forget the basics and think that a technique or an external secret or a complicated intellectual explanation or the next book is going to save them. Thats the problem with personal improvement nowadays
People are getting lazier because they have more options and more “I can do it next month” excuses or more excuses in the format of “I can’t do it because [insert explanation]” that they can hang on to
..and we forget the basics of real and solid personal transformation and how to get better as a person: PUSHING THROUGH discomfort, pushing through pain. Thats it.
Forget this, and you can fill up your mind with all kinds of theories that are going to comfort you, and it’s pretty much guaranteed that you are not going to move forward in your life
You have to push THROUGH discomfort and pain — not going around it trying to rationalize it away or find comfort in explanations and shit like that!
To your success,
Giuseppe Tavella, Dp/dr & Dissociation Therapist