Just accepting your symptoms and being aware of them and letting them be is not always the solution.
There are some situations where you need a DEEP and POWERFUL healing from the inside out, where you are in a lot of emotional pain,
people that have had emotionally immature parents that have either ruined your childhood or instilled in you very negative beliefs, people that have non-verbal and unconscious feelings of feeling unsafe, abandoned, rejected, hurt and dont know why, accumulated traumas, etc.
and all these “emotional situations” (you know you feel these “subtle and hard-to-describe feelings” when
(1) you have a hard time putting them into words
(2) they seem to run the background of your internal experience and negatively color pretty much every experience of your ‘external’ life by adding that “fear/what if/doubt layer” on top of every experience
(3) they are so stubborn and wont go way no matter how hard you explain your way out of them)
In those cases, what does accepting your symptoms do? What does letting the symptoms be there do? Nothing is FUNDAMENTALLY changing in you.
That unprocessed emotional content, those wounds, those pains, those demons of the past, those remote feelings, thoughts and voices that fill up and color the background of your awareness — they are still there waiting for you until you face them head on.
Let’s be realistic: If personal growth was about accepting symptoms and just letting them be and “move on with your life” and “try to live your life as best as you can”, then what kind of personal growth is that? Seriously.. 🤔
Now dont get me wrong: Acceptance of symptoms and letting them be without resisting them IS important in that if you keep resisting them or being afraid of them, you are always going to keep the cycle going no matter what you do.
So acceptance/ acknowledge/ let go IS truly and genuinely useful and true and DOES work, and i strongly suggest you keep applying it or to start if you are not applying it.
There are people that teach only that (plus some relaxation technique and boost your confidence tips) and it DOES work.
What im saying here though is that there are some people that need and want a SOLID and DEEP personal transformation from the inside out, who want to profoundly get better and stronger and to really get to know themselves,
who want to conquer themselves, who want to clear up stuck emotions and energies and traumas, who want to conquer the demons of the past, who want to be free from the past, take their power back, etc.
In those cases, accepting and letting go of problems and symptoms and “try to move on with your life” will do nothing or close to nothing.
For example if you have a fear-based hyper-awareness (ya know, scanning for dangers, etc.) when people are about to “abandon” you and you start to freak out and get anxious,
just telling yourself “i observe the fear, i acknowledge the fear, i accept the fear” WILL calm you down in those seconds, but one thing is more certain:
It will NOT heal that trauma/ wound/ subconscious belief/ persistent fear/ unprocessed pain/ feeling in the background/ recurrent stubborn thought no matter how much you try to accept it or rationalize/ intellectualize/ accept your way out of it
These are scenarios were just accepting your symptoms will not work or does work but you KNOW and FEEL that DEEP down that there’s an ocean of stuff that needs to come out, needs to be healed, felt, expressed, voiced, faced, understood, changed. If thats you, know that there’s a solution for that too 😁
In that case just accepting symptoms CAN make them better, but will not remove those stubborn underlying feelings and beliefs.
This is precisely what i can help you with and the #1 difference that sets me apart from all the other coaches/ therapists/ healers in my position that VERY often (if not always) talk about either acceptance, or just relaxing your body (and thats it, end of healing 🤣)
I do teach some acceptance here and there in that it is truly important, BUT thats just 1 percent.
The rest is deep transformational work, transforming you from the inside out, becoming stronger, facing your demons, becoming powerful
and at the same time feeling present, safe, confident, feeling and owning your emotions in the present, calmness, free from the chains of the past
Now you can see more clearly why, highly likely, just “accepting it” doesnt work with you and why, as far as i know, if you are one of the people i’ve described in this post, you need more POWERFUL and DEEPER solutions than just accepting it
This is what i do. This is my mission.
If you would like my guidance on how to overcome dissociation and the underlying (or contributing) anxiety/ self-doubt/ intrusive thoughts/ existential thinking/ traumas (all very linked), do feel free to private message me or to book your free discovery call here
Giuseppe Tavella, DPDR & Dissociation Specialist